Attack of The Oversexed Fag Hag

by Diego

Gay tip of the week: do not get gangbanged with your fag hag. Seriously, kids, don't do it. They will get more addicted to it than you will. And you girls' relationship will never be the same. It's kind of like sucking off your uncle when you're 10. Thanksgiving dinner is always a bit more nerve-wrecking ever after.

Anyway, it all started when I introduced Craigslist personals to my main fag hag, who after that night I don't think has slept, really. She is up at any given hour posting and reposting after her shit gets flagged. And after she is done with one guy she is already planning the next post. Actually, as she is getting fucked by one guy she's already wishing he leaves so that she can get another guy -- or several of them -- to come bang her out of her miserable St. Mark's Place studio-living existence. If that all sounds familiar, I understand. She really is a fag trapped in a fag hag's body. But a real unhealthy fag at that.


So in the beginning of her addiction we started having straight guys over to fuck us both at the same time. I was taking classes at NYU, she was studying for the bar exam, we didn't have the time to devote to each other. So we figured at least if we got gangfucked together we would stick together. But by the 5th or 6th gangbang I got sick of the whole thing. It just seemed very unlikely that I'd find a boyfriend from a gangbang in which everyone was just plugging my ass so they would be able to get some of her pussy. So I told her I couldn't do it anymore.

She about cried. "But I can't have sex without my fag!". What? Are you psycho? "I'm serious, I can't think of sex unless it's with you". I told her that was pretty unhealthy and that she should see a therapist. To which she said "But YOU're my therapist!". To which I said "No, I'm not, I'm your fag, not your husband!". To which she said "You're my GAY husband". To which I said "What-the-fuck".

So it's been a few weeks and she still says she can't bring herself to get fucked without the presence of her fag. She recently passed out at Grand Central and was taken to St. Vincent's Hospital by ambulance. They called me up and said she'd written my name for emergency contact and under "relation to patient" she wrote in "fag". They labeled her "mental" and I didn't disagree. This bitch needs some meds. And I need some time off. No hags for at least a month. But then I'm afraid she will take her life. So, kids, don't start something you can't continue. Especially if they involve women. We are gay for a fucking reason.


For more Diego blogs, click here.