Three's Company

Saturday night. drunk. Boysroom. East Village. Horny.

There, now you have the background. This sort of hot guy came up to me with a Marlboro hanging out of his mouth. A real rebel. He was pretty beefy and masculine, mid-thirties. Good top material for sure. Just like dogs that sniff each other's butts to get acquainted, we did the fag dance to get to know each other. You know the routine. It's dark and late (or early in morning-same difference) so you're not in the mood for small talk bull shit. He bought me a drink and we sort of grinded for 5 minutes and then decided to catch a cab to my upper west side apartment. I prayed that my roommate would be sleeping when I got home so he couldn't see my tragic 4am behavior. He was!


We snuck into my room and had sex? It's been a week and I still can't place my finger on what we did. I woke up naked and cotton-mouthed at 5:30am and noticed there was no one in bed with me...hmmmm...was I that drunk that I hallucinated the whole cab ride home? A few minutes later, Marlboro man came back into the room and slipped into bed with me. Damn, he had a nice bod and smelled a musky masculine smell. I asked where he had been and he said he had a cig in the living room. Cool. Sleep.

Morning! More like, Moooooooooringgggggg?!#$ (barf). I stumble out of bed and noticed that Marlboro man had let himself out while I was sleeping. Double bonus! No awkward morning after shit. I hate that whole, "sooo, you want breakfast? When yah leaving?!"

I ran into my roommate on the way to the bathroom and I noticed he looked pretty haggard himself and avoided eye contact. I was like, "wooo, what happened to you last night". He was like, "umm, nothin'". Over breakfast, he finally told me HIS Saturday night story. He had a fight with his boyfriend and slept alone here (angry, horny, drunk). All of a sudden, he felt a warm body climbing into bed with him at like 5am. (Okay, so now my wheels are turning). He thought it was his boyfriend coming to apologize. Well, there was cumming, but it wasn't apologetic. Anyway, the "warm body" started to enter the back door of my roommate and as he reached over, he noticed a much more sculpted physique than he was used to. Shock! My trick was fucking my roommate! Drunk bitches.

Now, you may think that a lot of sissy hair pulling ensued. Wrong! I laughed so hard I actually threw up. Ahhh, New York. Tricks come and go, but gay slutty roommates are forever. "Come and Knock on my back door". We've been waiting for you...okay, enough "Three's Company" jokes.